Give Your Best Without Saying It
From a theological standpoint, those who lived in the Patriarchal dispensation, where we read of men having more than one wife, had complicated lives where rivalries within the home were more frequent. I was led to a quote that the father of Samuel the judge made to one of his wives, Hannah, who was distraught because, at that time, God had not opened her womb, for she was barren while simultaneously being tormented and mocked by her rival Peninnah, who had children with their husband, Elkanah. The Bible tells us that on her way to worship, she was bullied and scorned by her rival, Peninnah. “So it was, year by year, when she went up to the house of the LORD, that she provoked her; therefore she wept and did not eat” (1 Samuel 1:7).
Her husband saw the condition that his wife was in and, with a pure heart, wanted to relieve her through his actions. What he did for her is a pattern for us to do for others. We cannot replace what others have lost; we cannot give them what we do not have to fill a missing void. We can acknowledge their need, and if it is not within our power to fill it, give them comfort. In the case of Elkanah, he gave Hannah what was in his power, a double portion.
Understand that when you try to help, you may get a dose of what God gets in response to his goodness. God is blessing us daily. When we do not get what we desire immediately, we accept the other blessings without giving them much thought because our focus is on our immediate wants or needs. Us reminding the person of how we are trying to comfort them and what we are doing will not fill that void. “Then Elkanah her husband said to her, “Hannah, why do you weep? Why do you not eat? And why is your heart grieved? Am I not better to you than ten sons?” (1 Samuel 1:8).
Sometimes we do not get it; there will be things that our loved ones, friends, and family deal with that we will never understand because it is not happening to us. We want to believe that good deeds ought to make them feel better. Remember, it is not about us; it is about them. Please don’t stop doing good; give them the comfort they need until they are made whole. “But when you do a charitable deed, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, that your charitable deed may be in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will Himself reward you openly” (Matthew 6:3-4).
©October 30, 2022,Courtney Henderson